On October 5, 1789, a mob of more than 7000 women shoes with espadrilles from the poorest districts of Paris, wielding knives and clubs, dragging two cannons lying by chains, bullowed by hunger and repression of monarchical soldiers, arrive at the doors of the palace of Versailles after six hours of marching on foot in the rain, the shout of “bread!” Louis XVI, the last absolutist monarch of France, decoured the curtains of the windows of their real stay and observes, amazed, the show. Revolutionary uprisings that have begun due to bread are countless. The French Revolution, very. The last one was Tuesday of last week. On July 1, 2025, Fabián León, former contestant of Masterchef with a fief of more than half a million followers on Instagram, officially opens in Madrid, in the Chamberí neighborhood, with a disc-jockey and the sculpture of a pinch of erect paneclos in the counter, Fu.ba, his futuristic baker. A single publication in networks, accompanied by four images of the event, functions as a match that turns on the fuse. One of those four images shows a role in which a manifesto is read: «We do not bake bread. We bake future.» And there begins the fire. «We are solarpunk, neo-ancestral and a little witches. We are the glitch in the matrix of food. A portal.» The manifesto of Fu.BA, written in the chatgpt language, mixing science fiction, quantum coaching and technoespiritual jargon, announces that Fu.Ba is not a bakery, but a portal. «Stardust to breead: ideas turned into bits. Bits turned into atoms. Of the stellar dust, the bread is born. And with it, a new dimension of the real.» In that space, the living image of Anakin Skywalker's home home, they don't sell bread. They are not here to «feed cravings.» They have come to «nourish your nervous system», to boost your being at a clean posthuman level of toxins, gluten, refined and past, through a Eucharist with cookies-hostia to four euros the unity, in which Jesus Christ has been replaced by a nft guru, a bot of the trained based on aphorisms of Paulo Coelho and Elon Musk. The networks burst into flames. The rejection tsunami was triggered in the form of thousands of missing comments, hilarious memes and even threads with in -depth sociological analysis, and generated millions of visualizations. It was fulminant, visceral, almost violent. Hours later, that same night, Fabián climbed to his personal Instagram account a carousel of videos recorded from the basement of his nodriza ship, with a unleashed expression, genuinely bewildered and pissed off, repeating «I do not understand» and «it is unfair», discussing the possibility that «people have interpreted everything bad» or who have reacted «by fun» by fun. » It's curious. The bread in Fu.BA is made by refined sugars, nor lactose, nor gluten, and only with high -end flour worked with slow fermentation. A bar at 3.50 is expensive for the consumer of normal bread, but is in the usual pricing range of bread for celiacs. It is even cheaper than some of the alternatives, most of which are full of additives and know punishment. If the Fu.BA campaign had focused on this, we would probably be (we will never know), before a winning strategy: Fabián offers better quality gluten without gluten and cheaper than its competitors. In addition, I have no proof, but no doubt, that his bread is delicious. The anger of the networks does not respond to the price of the bread, but to the carelessness of presenting a bread bar as a biohacking tool. It is visceral rejection of the nth attempt to instrumentalization of noble causes to get rooms to whom he fears for his health. It is fed up with another defender of the thesis that ceasing to be poor is a matter of ceasing to be «vibrationally scarce.» Because there is something deeply offensive in calling for «sleeping», «backward» or «without updating» («this is not a slice. It is an update») to whom the bar cannot afford to 3.50. The campaign excludes both the one who cannot pay and to the one who is dizzy before such a linguistic fog, and lands in a context in which millions of young people invest more than half of their salary in renting a room in a shared floor, in which maternity is not applauded indefinitely, and it is normalized to have three poorly paid jobs and live with anxiety. Fu What could have been an honest and inclusive proposal of good gluten-free bread at a reasonable price becomes, after the avalanche of crypto-monotic aesthetics and parable New Age, in an exclusive gesture, elitist and gentrifier wrapped in moral superiority. Irony, sarcasm and meme are forms of popular self -defense. Fu.ba's mistake is not to make expensive bread, but try to endorse us. It is not ignorance or fun, Fabian. It is class rage. Continue reading
